OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
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