I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
false alarm, still single
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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