Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
