currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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