I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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