1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize