How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
