Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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