I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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