I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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