What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
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