Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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