Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
two words...techno handjob
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize