New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
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