the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
