6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
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I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
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I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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