Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
