so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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