at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
that's an acceptable place to lick
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
