The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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