The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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