Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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