I feel like I'm in dance class right now
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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