Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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