I don't think brook has ever known best
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Randomize
