We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
