I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
