Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
