I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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