the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
you would pick up someone in the library
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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