So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
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