One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
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