Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing