i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Randomize
