I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
