Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
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Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
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ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
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