were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize