they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
