end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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