NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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