Texts From Last Night

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  (702): View more from Nevada

  I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.

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  (702): I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet. http://tfl.nu/4zwd
  Replies (36) Good night (3494) Bad night (1151)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...

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  (734): My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party... http://tfl.nu/viwm
  Replies (11) Good night (702) Bad night (4520)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store

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  (407): she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store http://tfl.nu/25ph
  Replies (86) Good night (14835) Bad night (2618)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself

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  (914): Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself http://tfl.nu/ot4u
  Replies (30) Good night (5409) Bad night (1415)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.

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  (970): Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well. http://tfl.nu/7lfy
  Replies (20) Good night (7562) Bad night (1416)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...

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  (+61): He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him... http://tfl.nu/efrg
  Replies (36) Good night (6232) Bad night (1433)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole

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  (410): I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole http://tfl.nu/hdrj
  Replies (7) Good night (2204) Bad night (748)
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.

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  (712): Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field. http://tfl.nu/ntdj
  Replies (6) Good night (1961) Bad night (947)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.

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  (205): High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead. http://tfl.nu/efrd
  Replies (11) Good night (2788) Bad night (807)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.

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  (704): Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water. http://tfl.nu/djc8
  Replies (2) Good night (988) Bad night (418)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?

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  (412): Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf? http://tfl.nu/41qm
  Replies (15) Good night (1038) Bad night (740)
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet

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  (321): He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet http://tfl.nu/nzlh
  Replies (3) Good night (841) Bad night (636)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.

  (1-618): View more from Illinois

  Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!

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  (618): One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat. (1-618): Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research! http://tfl.nu/3g8w
  Replies (6) Good night (1660) Bad night (359)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.

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  (937): I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms. http://tfl.nu/x3mv
  Replies (5) Good night (387) Bad night (855)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?

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  (847): On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds? http://tfl.nu/j3eb
  Replies (0) Good night (263) Bad night (460)

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