i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
