honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
