....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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