Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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