Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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