is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
