Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
