am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
