Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize