that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I have feelings that need drinking.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
