halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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